One is silver and the other is gold.

Does anyone wanna talk about the day after the fun? The days following a super awesome vacation? Or the non-stop family togetherness and spoiling? Because those days, those are the days that feel, so, ordinary. Usually it’s a welcomed feeling, a deep satisfaction that comes from sleeping in your own bed, on your own pillow. There is something delicious about being in your own space after traveling.

The mounds of laundry are done, the house is cleaned and aired out from being cooped up, and the pantry is re-stocked. We’ve been back to normal in our own home  for a few weeks now, and it’s feels delightfully calm. Quiet. Normal.

But maybe a little too quiet.

We miss our cousins. Our Grandma’s. Our Aunts and Uncles. Our dear friends. Going back for a visit is good for our relationships, our hearts, in order to stay connected across the miles. But it’s also hard because we see a glimpse of the life we’re not living next to them. Sure, it’s a life that we chose, but that doesn’t mean we enjoy every aspect of it. People who have moved away from everything familiar understand this tension. Some have moved for a job, others are chasing a dream, or pursuing career goals, or simply trying out a new adventure.

But the feelings are usually the same. It’s complicated, multi-layered. Some weeks and months, if I’m being completely honest,  it’s kinda nice to live without any family obligations, birthday parties every weekend, get togethers that fill up the calendar. But it’s also those same gatherings, being held without us, that sometimes make my heart ache. It’s probably because we actually like our family, and being with them usually reminds us how incredible that fact is. You put a lot of people together that you didn’t particularly choose, and add in their spouses and children and that creates a gaggle of people you’re kinda of stuck with for life.

I’m pretty thankful for the people I’m stuck with. They are really great.

And the people that aren’t our family, well gosh they are kinda stellar too. Life has scattered us and them, and we find ourselves far from many of those gems. But they are still gems, and they still radiate and sparkle, and attract others to themselves. And even though we move away from the special people in our lives, or they move away from us, two amazing things can happen. We can stay in touch. And we can meet new people, who can become our people. Not to replace our old people, obviously they are never replaceable, but more so because having face to face relationships is really important.

But all of that isn’t easy. It’s a lot of work. It requires effort, and time, and energy. And sometimes, we don’t have any of those things. Sometimes life is just so, full, that mustering up what is needed to keep old relationships alive and start new ones is just too daunting.

But today, on this day, I’d like to encourage you (and myself!) to keep at it. Relationships are always worth it. People are always worth it. Making new friends, and keeping the old? Always worth it. For “one is silver and the other is gold” said a kind and wise woman, who taught me that song in Kindergarten. And man, she was right.

5 thoughts on “One is silver and the other is gold.

  1. Love being your people, and love, love, love every minute we get to spend with you. We of course miss you like crazy but are so thankful and look forward to when we get to be with you. ❤️❤️❤️

  2. Jessica, I love reading what you write! Very well said! When God has a part in leading our lives, He is the one who we put our trust in. Families & Friends will become such a part of us that we share our lives with them & never want to give them up! You said it Best! We are not giving them up, but we are cherishing the moments when we will once again be with them! These times are very special! God has your family there to minister to now. Who knows what tomorrow will bring! We love you & pray His blessings on all of you! What a Beautiful Family!

  3. Ah yes – it is indeed so multilayered and complicated – this whole relationship thing. You raise issues that continue to face us again and again in every stage of life as we deal with relationships that come and go, the challenges of holding precious things loosely so we are not broken-hearted when they change, embracing new opportunities when we don’t feel like we can even face them. THAT was a run-on sentence , just as my thoughts run on. But in the end all we have is today with the people God has put in our path this day. And each one who comes – and goes – affects who I am moving forward. I am so thankful for you, for the way you touch my day even across the miles today. You really do have a gift for capturing thoughts that reflect real life. Hugs today❣️

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