Does anyone wanna talk about the day after the fun? The days following a super awesome vacation? Or the non-stop family togetherness and spoiling? Because those days, those are the days that feel, so, ordinary. Usually it’s a welcomed feeling, a deep satisfaction that comes from sleeping in your own bed, on your own pillow. There is something delicious about being in your own space after traveling.
The mounds of laundry are done, the house is cleaned and aired out from being cooped up, and the pantry is re-stocked. We’ve been back to normal in our own home for a few weeks now, and it’s feels delightfully calm. Quiet. Normal.
But maybe a little too quiet.
We miss our cousins. Our Grandma’s. Our Aunts and Uncles. Our dear friends. Going back for a visit is good for our relationships, our hearts, in order to stay connected across the miles. But it’s also hard because we see a glimpse of the life we’re not living next to them. Sure, it’s a life that we chose, but that doesn’t mean we enjoy every aspect of it. People who have moved away from everything familiar understand this tension. Some have moved for a job, others are chasing a dream, or pursuing career goals, or simply trying out a new adventure.
But the feelings are usually the same. It’s complicated, multi-layered. Some weeks and months, if I’m being completely honest, it’s kinda nice to live without any family obligations, birthday parties every weekend, get togethers that fill up the calendar. But it’s also those same gatherings, being held without us, that sometimes make my heart ache. It’s probably because we actually like our family, and being with them usually reminds us how incredible that fact is. You put a lot of people together that you didn’t particularly choose, and add in their spouses and children and that creates a gaggle of people you’re kinda of stuck with for life.
I’m pretty thankful for the people I’m stuck with. They are really great.
And the people that aren’t our family, well gosh they are kinda stellar too. Life has scattered us and them, and we find ourselves far from many of those gems. But they are still gems, and they still radiate and sparkle, and attract others to themselves. And even though we move away from the special people in our lives, or they move away from us, two amazing things can happen. We can stay in touch. And we can meet new people, who can become our people. Not to replace our old people, obviously they are never replaceable, but more so because having face to face relationships is really important.
But all of that isn’t easy. It’s a lot of work. It requires effort, and time, and energy. And sometimes, we don’t have any of those things. Sometimes life is just so, full, that mustering up what is needed to keep old relationships alive and start new ones is just too daunting.
But today, on this day, I’d like to encourage you (and myself!) to keep at it. Relationships are always worth it. People are always worth it. Making new friends, and keeping the old? Always worth it. For “one is silver and the other is gold” said a kind and wise woman, who taught me that song in Kindergarten. And man, she was right.