15 years.

My husband and I had our 15 year wedding anniversary yesterday!!! Months ago we began talking and dreaming about doing something extraordinary, because, let’s be honest, being together for that amount of time and still actually loving each other, seems like a thing to celebrate! Talks started big, Brandon threw out words like “Antartica and weeks” which sounded lovely but oh so unrealistic. I countered with words like “same country please” and “who can watch our kids?” Two weeks quickly melted to 5 days due to more work on Brandon’s plate than he ever expected. Five days on a tiny Caribbean Island off Nicaragua gave way to perhaps something closer to home as the country has been holding it’s breath for the last six weeks during civil unrest. Five days gave way to zero days as the woman who was going to watch our kids last week/weekend was stuck in the town of Mategalpa (about 2 hours away) for 9 days because the roads were completely blocked. Like no one/nothing to or from that town. So this weekend came, and we held our breath. I was trying to not get my hopes up, realizing my heart would be crushed if the day came and went with little more than a nod.

But, despite all the odds, I am writing to you from our lovely condo by the beach while I listen to the sound of the ocean.

Even though there are road blocks, and marches, and uncertainty lurking around the corner of the streets, and our hearts, we went. Even though it feels weird and selfish to go do something fun while the whole country is uneasy and stressed out, we went. Even though we felt a tad uneasy leaving our children an hour away at such a time, some dear friends stepped up and offered to check in on them and take care of them if there is any emergency, so we went. And this morning, even though our baby girl had a fever when we left, and my guilt was so high hot tears came, we know how much she adores Dora, so we went.

We are here. And it feels magical. When most days you’ll find us drowning in a sea of children, the opportunity to be alone just the two of us is life giving. It reminds me how much I like that guy!! He’s kinda pretty awesome. I can’t always see that when we are doing life side by side. When we are busy attending to, helping, correcting, loving, and raising three small kids. When we are trying to start a business in a foreign, third world country. When we are trying to re-build community, friendships, and find a church. So it’s moments like these that are essential to who we are as a couple. To honor and remember and smile at the commitment made such a long time ago, by two ridiculously young and slightly goofy looking kids. A commitment that needs more than the occasional nod at each other across the tops of kids heads. This weekend is a chance to be alone, to reflect and remember how it all began and celebrate what a fun, exciting, wild, hard, and amazing ride these past fifteen have been. There is no one I’d rather do life with than the man taking a nap right next to me.